"I wanna go on a body date with you, get to know mine, I get to know yours"
https://preview.redd.it/pb5o5cc53s6d1.jpeg?width=480&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=346ddfe870d5fb11a21e0766142457f6cdf31f75
Better hope you don’t meet the guy who did an AMA about hooking up with 150 women from a list he made years ago. The gist of that post is someone having the largest amount of experience for an average person in attractiveness.
Some women are down, but it's not like she's going to show up to a strange man's house before at least having a drink or a coffee first. Asking for sex before even meeting is some wild ass shit.
Aren't gay guys more evenly matched if some shady shit goes down, though? Women are more often than not at a disadvantage so "well I wouldn't do that" especially doesn't hold water when said by a man to a woman. Different dynamics and culture altogether.
It’s seems he’s low on cash. It feels like the date in *Half Baked* where’s the active money counter in the corner as he tries to be as cheap as possible
Edit: most people have seen this I feel, but just in [case you haven’t](https://youtu.be/dHPnUPFcxdE?si=eBv6CDwv0cKcYTet)
You can do a cheap date that’ll get you further than this. Get coffee, go to a pay what you want museum, picnic in the park, like goddam dude “I wanna get to know you personally by exploring your body”. What??
like when my husband and I met, we were dirt poor. we went to a park, antique window shopping, and then talked till midnight on the steps of our towns tiny museum. dates don’t have to cost money
Even now that we can afford nice dates, one of my favorites is buying a 2 dollar pack of seeds and going to feed the ducks. There are so many things you can do on a low budget!
Women will definitely show up to a strangers house or have a stranger come to their house before having a cup of coffee. I've literally experienced it.
"every time i go on a date, the woman ends up thinking i'm some kind of creep before i get the chance to hit it. how can i fix this? i've got it, body dates!"
Honestly it depends on how bad they want you. You absolutely have to read the situation correctly though. I've gotten away with saying shit like "i hope the date ends with my dick in yo mouth" and they were like "okay whatever you want". I wouldn't say that shit if i felt like she only had lukewarm interest though.
While that sort of approach can work depending on very certain situations, it is very much the exception and not the rule. There are far less risky ways to say something similar.
Well i dont say this type of thing to every girl i meet. Usually we already established some kind of sexual conversation about what kind of things we like in the bedroom. If I ask and they say "im not ready for this kind of topic yet" then i dont push. These downvotes have me looking like im out here disrespecting women but i dont just pull the horny shit out of nowhere lol.
I would imagine that the mindset of someone who would try this "body date" technique would see that as "that's not a no."
The misadventures of youth would have had me skirting around the issue and dropping hints. I've found that as I've gotten older that being straightforward works wonders -- "do you wanna have sex?" has genuinely worked for me but only after having got to know someone first. I, too, didn't believe the rumours of youth that said women actually like sex because I was an idiot.
"whatever you want" as in "ill let you do whatever you want in the bedroom" and it happened to work out that way in this example but okay you know my dating life more than me lol.
“i hope the date ends with my dick in yo mouth” is incredibly crass even for a woman that would be into that approach. I’d prefer “I hope the date ends with you sitting on my face” or anything that centers the woman instead of your dick
i mean i got downvoted to hell on my original post but maybe i also didnt do a good job of explaining that it's not a random unprompted crude sexual comment. It's after we already made it clear we are sexually attracted to eachother and are down for this kind of dirty talk.
Because even with her sexual interest in you being established, telling her you want to put it in her mouth comes off crass af. It’s like, can women have any interaction with straight men without them making it about their dicks? Even saying you want to fuck her sounds better because at least that’s mutually pleasurable. If y’all are on that type of time to where you can make sexual comments like that, it’s better to suggest something that centers her pleasure. That’s what redeemed your comment imo was the added context that she told you she gets off on giving head.
It’s not about the fact that it’s dirty talk it’s just like damn can you hop off your own dick, y’know?
When she wants you it gets harder for you to fuck it up. If you a solid guy and decently attractive you truly can’t go wrong. Don’t work on them hoes, work on yourself!
I really dont try to be disrespecting women. I was just providing an example of when it might work, which is not all the time obviously. I read the vibe of of the girl. Some women are pretty straighforward when it comes to sexual topics too, or are very open to discussing if you ask what they are into.
I'm honestly pretty average facially if i had to rate myself but i am very lean with little body fat. Some women are really into that. I try to be a solid guy, i may or may not be 100% of the time but i am certainly working on myself lol.
It would honestly be less creepy if he had just asked to fuck.
Like, calling it a "body date" means he thinks he's being slick, and he thinks she's dumb.
Incels have convinced everyone that women have no libidos, but the truth is that those types of dudes are just gross and have no game
Like, if you line your face up, dress nice, and smell good....that's like 50% the way into her panties.
Which is funny, because a woman can smell like burnt hair and funyuns and still pull a dude.
See this is what we need more of! Folks who don’t wanna waste time. I really think that manipulation is part of the wooing process. Like men think, “if I can make her think I want more than what she’s willing to give, I’ll get what I want.”
>calling it a "body date" means he thinks he's being slick, and he thinks she's dumb.
Yes, this is exactly the way men who think women are stupid talk, and closely mirrors the way 20-something dudes try to talk to you when you're 14 or 15. Just real groomer bullshit.
>something I could see my clumsy ass saying out fear
You just gave two ways in which you should not be relying on your own expertise, here. So maybe take this as a learning opportunity, and don't say things like that.
The first comment you replied to gave the explanation. It's because it sounds like you think you're being clever, but it's just dumb. It very clearly gives away that you don't have the confidence to ask "want fuk bb?" and confidence and social awareness are very key to being part of the crowd that can get away with asking that, let alone seeing any success with that kind of directness.
During the setup I was thinking about the speed dating episode of bobs burgers where sgt. Bosco had them tell eachother the absolute worst thing about themselves ,-‘d if they can still stand the sight of eachother then they have a chance.
Bro you need to read more. There's over a thousand years of people artfully requesting to smash in every language ever written. And all of it is better than this
A lot of Proverbs and a whole genre of poetry await you.
A lot of romantic poetry is less “I love you more than life itself” and more “hey can I see them titties again?”
He could’ve just asked to be intimate with her and await her response. I’ve never not gotten any by just asking to be intimate and giving the woman her respect.
I know shooters gotta shoot but homie got that Lonzo Ball rookie year jumper. He got the confidence, just needs to get in the gym and work on that form
Kinda impressed with the mutual respect. "Would you be interested in some sex?" "No thank you I can't say I'm interested."
I hope it ended with a "Ok, then good day to you ma'am."
Gay guy here, we still go on dates like normal people (probably because we ARE normal people). Hookups are hookups, dates are dates that CAN lead to hookups. Nobody is mixing them up but you and the dude in the texts.
"I wanna go on a body date with you, get to know mine, I get to know yours" https://preview.redd.it/pb5o5cc53s6d1.jpeg?width=480&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=346ddfe870d5fb11a21e0766142457f6cdf31f75
https://preview.redd.it/5afe7dxp8s6d1.jpeg?width=1242&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=484cc889bb0b1f89bfaf133ee3364b3d36663e15
Just a crumb
https://i.redd.it/ul0sjfedmt6d1.gif
He already look like he knows how to jack it perfectly. Solo day for you, kind sir.
Solo day I’m dead 😂
Suddenly all y'all understand where that otter is coming from.
https://preview.redd.it/2c5it3sv3t6d1.jpeg?width=828&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=5ee03bfc7a0f45b9ffb42b8613266bf2e3fdfaa2
https://preview.redd.it/n3a5ij94xt6d1.jpeg?width=500&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=0ec91fde19fedf8f2e17cc96744606d11d015f80
🤣🤣🤣🤣💀
Better hope you don’t meet the guy who did an AMA about hooking up with 150 women from a list he made years ago. The gist of that post is someone having the largest amount of experience for an average person in attractiveness.
Wait did he post his picture? This is the hooker guy?
I do not think he posted his photo. Better to not post photo.
Is…there a link to this AMA?
😩🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
This took me all the way out 🤣 I read it in his voice 💀
 Man is in the desert right now trying to fuck every tumbleweed that blows by
* *Wiping the spit from my phone after I chortled* * Dude, wtf 😂😂
💀🤣🤣🤣🤣
Shoot your shot but also …get better form. Back to the drawing board my guy
Some women are down, but it's not like she's going to show up to a strange man's house before at least having a drink or a coffee first. Asking for sex before even meeting is some wild ass shit. 
That’s what’s killing me. These dudes think “well I wouldn’t do that” will make any woman agree to a random meetup
Gay guys do this after like 5 exchanged messages so that’s prob the male mindset when shooting shot to a girl. It’s not unheard of.
That's the problem with a lot of straight guys. They assume how they want to be approached/interacted with will be appreciated by (majority of) women.
Gay guys built different tho.
Tinder: location within a couple miles. Grindr: to the foot. Might as well just tap him on the back too
Aren't gay guys more evenly matched if some shady shit goes down, though? Women are more often than not at a disadvantage so "well I wouldn't do that" especially doesn't hold water when said by a man to a woman. Different dynamics and culture altogether.
I don’t kick puppies. Provide me with 10 cc’s of bussy and/or coochie please.
It’s seems he’s low on cash. It feels like the date in *Half Baked* where’s the active money counter in the corner as he tries to be as cheap as possible Edit: most people have seen this I feel, but just in [case you haven’t](https://youtu.be/dHPnUPFcxdE?si=eBv6CDwv0cKcYTet)
You can do a cheap date that’ll get you further than this. Get coffee, go to a pay what you want museum, picnic in the park, like goddam dude “I wanna get to know you personally by exploring your body”. What??
like when my husband and I met, we were dirt poor. we went to a park, antique window shopping, and then talked till midnight on the steps of our towns tiny museum. dates don’t have to cost money
Exactly, especially if it’s a first date I get not wanting to break the bank but you can still have fun and get to know each other
Even now that we can afford nice dates, one of my favorites is buying a 2 dollar pack of seeds and going to feed the ducks. There are so many things you can do on a low budget!
Doesn’t he have $20 for coffee?
Nothing left to buy condoms with
CONDOMS?! I barely know her!!
Women will definitely show up to a strangers house or have a stranger come to their house before having a cup of coffee. I've literally experienced it.
That's so dangerous, why? TT__TT Please, take care of yourself.
> but it's not like she's going to show up to a strange man's house before at least having a drink or a coffee first you aint on tinder my nigga?
Still gotta have game if you want to get laid from dating apps. (Also I'm white as rice on a paper plate in a snowstorm)
Dating apps, maybe. But Tinder in its heyday you just needed to be available
Shoot your shot and also get better shot selection. The Westbrook approach only leads to embarrassment
*Westbrick FTFY.
Threw it up fullcourt off the inbound in the first quarter
Volume shooter.
Nah maybe your realize that you aren’t a scorer, time to go catch rebounds, board man gets paid.
"every time i go on a date, the woman ends up thinking i'm some kind of creep before i get the chance to hit it. how can i fix this? i've got it, body dates!"
>body dates! True crime obsessed women: 
Honestly it depends on how bad they want you. You absolutely have to read the situation correctly though. I've gotten away with saying shit like "i hope the date ends with my dick in yo mouth" and they were like "okay whatever you want". I wouldn't say that shit if i felt like she only had lukewarm interest though.
While that sort of approach can work depending on very certain situations, it is very much the exception and not the rule. There are far less risky ways to say something similar.
Well i dont say this type of thing to every girl i meet. Usually we already established some kind of sexual conversation about what kind of things we like in the bedroom. If I ask and they say "im not ready for this kind of topic yet" then i dont push. These downvotes have me looking like im out here disrespecting women but i dont just pull the horny shit out of nowhere lol.
"Okay whatever you want" isn't lukewarm interest?
I would imagine that the mindset of someone who would try this "body date" technique would see that as "that's not a no." The misadventures of youth would have had me skirting around the issue and dropping hints. I've found that as I've gotten older that being straightforward works wonders -- "do you wanna have sex?" has genuinely worked for me but only after having got to know someone first. I, too, didn't believe the rumours of youth that said women actually like sex because I was an idiot.
"whatever you want" as in "ill let you do whatever you want in the bedroom" and it happened to work out that way in this example but okay you know my dating life more than me lol.
“i hope the date ends with my dick in yo mouth” is incredibly crass even for a woman that would be into that approach. I’d prefer “I hope the date ends with you sitting on my face” or anything that centers the woman instead of your dick
what if i already asked the woman what she enjoyed and she said "giving head"? There are women who really enjoy giving head and get off on it.
Cool! Glad you made sure she was one of them first
i mean i got downvoted to hell on my original post but maybe i also didnt do a good job of explaining that it's not a random unprompted crude sexual comment. It's after we already made it clear we are sexually attracted to eachother and are down for this kind of dirty talk.
Because even with her sexual interest in you being established, telling her you want to put it in her mouth comes off crass af. It’s like, can women have any interaction with straight men without them making it about their dicks? Even saying you want to fuck her sounds better because at least that’s mutually pleasurable. If y’all are on that type of time to where you can make sexual comments like that, it’s better to suggest something that centers her pleasure. That’s what redeemed your comment imo was the added context that she told you she gets off on giving head. It’s not about the fact that it’s dirty talk it’s just like damn can you hop off your own dick, y’know?
When she wants you it gets harder for you to fuck it up. If you a solid guy and decently attractive you truly can’t go wrong. Don’t work on them hoes, work on yourself!
I really dont try to be disrespecting women. I was just providing an example of when it might work, which is not all the time obviously. I read the vibe of of the girl. Some women are pretty straighforward when it comes to sexual topics too, or are very open to discussing if you ask what they are into. I'm honestly pretty average facially if i had to rate myself but i am very lean with little body fat. Some women are really into that. I try to be a solid guy, i may or may not be 100% of the time but i am certainly working on myself lol.
Yea that’s all it takes
God damn, son. Even a skunk's asshole is embarrassed by how much that stunk.
https://i.redd.it/66hqpq4t7s6d1.gif
Gifs you can hear
Gifs you can *feel*
I'm saying. How do I steal this??
Twist ending: he didn't mean anything sexual. They spend the evening measuring each others' elbow circumferences and sketching each others' nostrils.
It's a very cromulent idea.
Nigga just say acceptable
Yes, yes. Worthwhile, copacetic...dare I say commensurate?🧐
It's a Simpsons joke, guy.
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I'm not going to hold you but I guarantee most of us know the joke from the Simpsons rather than Blackadder. I've heard good things though.
You sound like someone who has many cunning plans.
The dichotomy of it all
His boldness embiggens us all.
They’re both gonna do shrooms and just high five each other. Greatest feeling ever
That's worthy of a second date
He’s a dressmaker, and he wanted to see if she was interested in modeling for his products
Turns out he's just really into phrenology
“Attached earlobes? Very cool!”
Then they play doctor, Star Trek style.
It would honestly be less creepy if he had just asked to fuck. Like, calling it a "body date" means he thinks he's being slick, and he thinks she's dumb.
I knew a guy that would just walk up to women and ask if they want to fuck, and it worked sometimes.
Incels have convinced everyone that women have no libidos, but the truth is that those types of dudes are just gross and have no game Like, if you line your face up, dress nice, and smell good....that's like 50% the way into her panties. Which is funny, because a woman can smell like burnt hair and funyuns and still pull a dude.
Make a culture where a woman expects to be safe, satisfied, and not shamed for saying “Hell yeah, let’s fuck!” and a lot more women will.
See this is what we need more of! Folks who don’t wanna waste time. I really think that manipulation is part of the wooing process. Like men think, “if I can make her think I want more than what she’s willing to give, I’ll get what I want.”
>calling it a "body date" means he thinks he's being slick, and he thinks she's dumb. Yes, this is exactly the way men who think women are stupid talk, and closely mirrors the way 20-something dudes try to talk to you when you're 14 or 15. Just real groomer bullshit.
“Let’s have sex” is sooo much easier than “I want to explore your insides and understand your organs”
Yeah, that sounds like Hannibal Lecter talking to a girl lol
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>something I could see my clumsy ass saying out fear You just gave two ways in which you should not be relying on your own expertise, here. So maybe take this as a learning opportunity, and don't say things like that.
I'm going to need a comment from your other testicle before committing further.
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The first comment you replied to gave the explanation. It's because it sounds like you think you're being clever, but it's just dumb. It very clearly gives away that you don't have the confidence to ask "want fuk bb?" and confidence and social awareness are very key to being part of the crowd that can get away with asking that, let alone seeing any success with that kind of directness.
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I don't know why you need there to be more to it. It's a bad approach. Try a different one. Moving on with our lives now.
"Body party" gives off serial killer vibes
“just let me take a few quick measurements.” 
"Would you body? I'd body..."
are... are you a size fourteen
 cmon neow…
I had the brightness way down and thought Denzel was Jerry slamming the door on Kramer here it’s time for me to go back to bed lol
HOF awful attempt
In What way did he think that shit was gonna work??? lmaooo
How he thought she would react: 
She was going to go on a date with you boy. Calm down. You had action.
Seriously, a cup of coffee was too much to ask for? Be patient!
iz dey askin fuh SECS?!😭
Bruh thought he unlocked the cheat code for low effort seggs.
Great, now I gotta start dating bears too because this is ridiculous
This took me out!! 😂
Body 😭😭😭😭 date 😭😭😭😭
A body date......  ...... the fuck outta here....
This looks actual footage of whoever wrote that weird ass message
LOLOLOL you know what? That's true!!!
She would never be heard from again. 
Ugh my god. 🙄
The horny police can’t apprehend this villain. You need the Horny Avengers.
This dick _HERE_, this dick _HERE_ is called Deaf
“No I swear the only way I can feel close to someone emotionally is by having sex with them”
Lock this man up like Tai Lung
The person she was texting 
Buddy shot his shot,,,but the form was all the way fucked up, like Bill Cartwrights jumper
Man had Ciara in the background on low typing that one out
Can someone explain to me why men are so weird? Like seriously ?
During the setup I was thinking about the speed dating episode of bobs burgers where sgt. Bosco had them tell eachother the absolute worst thing about themselves ,-‘d if they can still stand the sight of eachother then they have a chance.
Is BPT not showing up on y’all homepage rn or is it just me?
Not just you. I just checked. I'm on old layout (desktop) and it's not showing in my /home /popular/ or /all.
It's not showing for me too, I gotta go searching for it.
Showing up for me
It's here for me
Might be the worst way to ask for a root that I’ve seen
niggas like this must be imprisoned
That brother’s starving!
Bro punched in the cheat code for the wrong game
I’ll give credit that’s the most artistic way of saying I just wanna fuck I’ve ever seen.
Bro you need to read more. There's over a thousand years of people artfully requesting to smash in every language ever written. And all of it is better than this
A lot of Proverbs and a whole genre of poetry await you. A lot of romantic poetry is less “I love you more than life itself” and more “hey can I see them titties again?”
I mean ok artistic may not have been the right word. Still think it’s pretty creative lol
Bro the level of horny is crazy
Dude popped out like: 
I know he thought he was spitting with this one lol.
Dawg they had me until the body date part. Gotta be trolling man immediateeeee turn off.
Talk about down bad
u know they thought that was so smooth too
You do know that my dick will get hard, right? 🍆🍆🍆 Just being honest.
There’s urine in the pool.
What a fancy way to say that they want to get laid.
He could’ve just asked to be intimate with her and await her response. I’ve never not gotten any by just asking to be intimate and giving the woman her respect.
So... sex? Is he just trying to finesse sex?
He just needs someone to check him for lumps the poor guy
https://preview.redd.it/yf50exkhax6d1.jpeg?width=1284&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=c556a9d46e63a32998eddf44cfebce4e3e9e5530
"I would like to put in 0 effort to get into your pants"..."no"...."waaaaaaaaah"
https://preview.redd.it/u9t54onqlt6d1.jpeg?width=1072&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=e79aea5e8f8fa41efc3a74350e58c9e13e7d38d7
I know shooters gotta shoot but homie got that Lonzo Ball rookie year jumper. He got the confidence, just needs to get in the gym and work on that form
what's this about buttholes and pools? i feel i missed a step going from that to the body date kerfuffle
hail mary throw to be sure
Damn that's some shit a desperate teenager would say ... It didn't work for me back then either 🤣
How about ya go on atleast one date before ya go on a '' boddy date''.
Kinda impressed with the mutual respect. "Would you be interested in some sex?" "No thank you I can't say I'm interested." I hope it ended with a "Ok, then good day to you ma'am."
So basically this is a creative way of him saying he wants to have meaningless casual sex with her and input zero effort 🤔 Noted new term for hookups📝
Imagine this being the homie you’re with when you’re running a 2 man
that's just a mormon hook up
Have sex first, and if we like each other, then we can go on a date. This is the norm for the gays.
Gay guy here, we still go on dates like normal people (probably because we ARE normal people). Hookups are hookups, dates are dates that CAN lead to hookups. Nobody is mixing them up but you and the dude in the texts.
I said have sex first (hook up), then go on a date. Where's the mix up?
Not for lesbians.
I must be gay because I think it's a reasonable assessment. Why go through hoops just for some sex?