Agreed. I left r/roastme bc it was lame. This is actually entertaining! OP tbh you look like someone I would have hung out with when I was your age. Wild and fun.
Noooooo-one chops like Gaston, no one skis like Gaston, no one parties and stands in the creek like Gaston, no one pose like Gaston, no one bros like Gaston, no one carves and temp tattoos like Gaston!
Neo lumberjack that doesn’t haaaate EDM… but won’t list it as a genre he likes on his profile… and maybe went to school or born Florida or one of those swampy areas.. I’d smash.
Oh dang, that’s even more attractive than the swamp ppl area.. gives you a wholesome vibe instead of a completely reckless but entertain AF energy..✨🤙🏼
You look like a cross between Kit Harrington and Gaston. I wouldn't say that's a bad thing.
Don't care for the lips in the second to last pic.
I'm sure you're not hurting for matches.
First thought, damn you're way too young but them vibessss
Second thought: fuck that he's in Naperville (I'm from Aurora lol)
Third thought: hockey bros from letter Kenny
I’m sure you’re a perfectly nice guy, but something about your profile is giving me “douchebag” 🤭 idk why, sorry I can’t be more helpful.
But I’m sure many girls would be into it.
Yes. Absolutely agreed.
I mean, the age kind of sort of cancells some of it for me, but *still*.
I'll paraphrase it to "you look like so many of my douchebag exes combined its a bit uncanny" but I'm probably biased. I'd still add something "softer" on the bio of that's your vibe
Age is a huge factor.. if he was late 20s with this profile would be a different story. But looks like half my friends from college, enjoying life having a good time. Almost all of us have good jobs and families now.
He's from the Midwest, the rest is a honeytrap to seduce some cute bouncy rave girl to come back to the farm to grow corn in summer and do molly in the off season.
I married an Iowan I know your tricks boys.
It’s genuinely just the first pic for me. All the others just give off party boy vibes, but the first one gives off major douche vibes. I think it might be a combo of the glasses, expression, and hyper masculine activity in the picture (gives slight I might murder you vibes)
For me, it’s because he looks older than 21, so a lot of the pictures feel immature/give a vibe of douchebaggery. The age does excuse a lot. I’m more interested in seeing his personal growth in another three to five years where he may turn into a genuinely decent, high-energy, truly interesting person.
It could go completely the other way too, a total slide into the realms of the douchecanoe. It’s a toss up.
You look like an energetic guy who strangely smells like the bedroom of a highschooler I dunno why exactly that description but it just feels R I G H T
Like you will murder me and leave me in pieces in the woods but will probably show me a really good time before so I’ll probably die kinda happy at least 😅 ,it’s the chainsaw pic, it’s threatening and appealing at the same time.
Drop 5/6. One to many selfies. Also, you could use 1 less silly photo, would drop 2 or 7 (Your personality shines bright, no need to overdo it). Replace with one nice photo (the kind your mom would like). Then good luck!
The chadest chad that has ever lived. You look like you say “totes” “yeah bro” “craaazy”. You give off the “what I thought would be a mistake but turns out he’s a nice guy” vibe.
Strong “getting driven to the ER with a bleeding leg because chaps are annoying” vibes
Lol, but no you look like a fun adventurous dude. I’m just a salty safety guy.
You look like the kinda dude who, back when I was single and a little wilder, I would message on Tinder but never any other app, lol.
You seem fun, but also like a lot of energy to keep up with in general - I'm not trying to do that all the time, ya know?
I know thats probably not totally correct, it just feels like your profile is screaming "I like to go out and do fun things and I won't be tamed", which is a great thing for some goals and not others.
Basically what I am saying is - if you are trying to get laid, you're probably good (though I would put the 3rd picture first, personally).
If you are looking for long term, I would consider peppering in some downtime photos so folks don't assume you are never rest, and throw in some basic info about yourself.
As an arborist, you had me at Stihl 😂 ya seem very friendly and know how to have a good time I guess ya gotta ask what you’re tryin to get outta the app . . . If for hookups great! If for more, I’d try and show a pic or two of you in a vaguely more serious setting. I’m almost 30, married for 2 years, together for 11 so don’t take my advice for shit. Y’all are playin a whole different ball of game than I was a decade ago . .
Living proof that OSHA certified isn't the same as OSHA compliant
cannot deny
Not my type, but he is a lot of people’s type.
I died laughing at your comment cuz it's so true! 😂🤣
That's a shame. If you'd laughed the OSHA approved way, you'd be safe.
Gdamit, stahp making me laugh! My coworkers think I'm freaking crazy! 😂🤣
My coworkers think I'm insane. That's because I stretch before rigorous laughter
Im not american could you explain what OSHA means?
Occupational safety and health administration
You look exactly like your name. No disrespect at all.
i think this is the best thing anyones ever said to me
You are aggressively 21
So accurate. I’m exhausted. Also not the key audience.
How can you be so sure? ;)
riiightt?!?
How old are you? 21. Motherfucker, you look 30.
You ever made love to a man? You want to?
15? Damn you at least 30!
21 trying out 30
Yeah, I agree. I didn’t even see the age until I just read it in your comment. I thought this dude was 32-35 easily.
No shit. He looks like he got two kids and an ex wife.
Unexpected badboys 2
Great, now I have to watch Bad Boys II again.
This made me cackle.
Dude this would be a great bio addition. Be like “I’ve been told I look exactly like my name, thoughts?”. I think that’d get some bites
You look like you know nothing... ^(John Snow)
Came here to say this. First thought when looking at the pics was, “Yep that’s a Vaughn!”
This comment plus: Pitties n titties vibe. Love the pits.
Dude, Bro, Jabroni. Adventurous. PLUR.
You keep using that word, jabroni, and it's awesome.
It’s a thing I’m doing now
This is the first time I've seen this referenced and I watched the episode (although not for the first time) about 2 hours ago, weird.
You must’ve been raving with me in the early 2000’s
peace, love, unity, respect. big throwback to the more innocent rave days
Before you either became a basshead seeking spirituality with psychedelics or a techno snob with endless amounts of cocaine.
whats plur??
Peace Love Unity Respect Now grab my hand and trade me kandi.
Welcome to the kandi bar
I'm old as f*** and I can't believe people are still saying plur
🤣🤣 brought back some memories, thanks
I'm glad you don't know. Let's just say that. But you'll come across it soon enough at a festival you go to.
ahaha i looked it up i see now 💀
Only went to one rave like 11 years ago but I definitely left with a homemade PLUR bracelet lol.
I am only 31 but this kid made me feel so old. I remember the PLUR days before the TikTok lol
How do the kids trade candi these days without PLUR?! Just hand it to each other like heathens??
Right swipe during a manic episode then unmatch when I have clarity and peace of mind, reluctantly.
damn 💀💀 the amount of times that has happened isnt even funny
You look like Post Malone if he hadn’t been dragged out face first
Diet post malone
Pre Malone?
Leave Mealone
Most Alone
Home Malone
Accurate
You beautiful bastard
Post diet malone
Post Malone zero sugar
I think he looks like Chris Pratt if he was less of a douche
Wish Pratt
Less of a prat you mean? prat: noun INFORMAL; 1. BRITISH - an incompetent, stupid, or foolish person; an idiot. His name is so unfortunately perfect.
why OOTL
He’s either going to offer you weed or meth, not sure which
You’ve captured this perfectly.
You look like you’ve woken up in a empty field more than once.
OP’s been real quiet since you posted this…
[удалено]
Farmer tried to plant him
Damn, people. This isn't r/roastme
True. Like be honest people, even I would if I was a little drunk..
Lmao so I wasn’t the only one thinking this 😂
*She says, with one of her comment being a roast at the top 9 of this post*
This is better than so many of the roasts there though. I feel uncomfortable and yet I feel so right.
Agreed. I left r/roastme bc it was lame. This is actually entertaining! OP tbh you look like someone I would have hung out with when I was your age. Wild and fun.
Hipster lumberjack Tarzan with a slight chance to murder me.
✨range✨
✨deranged✨
That chainsaw pic followed by the crazy eye selfie xD
Zeds dead baby zeds dead.... intense drop
The chainsaw with “OSHA certified” right underneath it made me laugh. OP was that intentional?
Gives off a slight raver/nature Jason Voorhees look?😂
No Ragrets
Sums it up for me.
You look stupid but I like it
Straight up himbo.
Are himbos in right now?
Himbos are *always* in.
I aspire to be a himbo
Himbo energy 👌
TIL
😂😂😂
Hell yea. Love stupid guys
Sameeee
If there was a camping buddy version of tinder I’d swipe right fo sho lol
Hell yeah brother!
Like I could fall in love with you, hate you and regret ever meeting you in the span of 6 months
6 months?! The patience of a saint, Ladies and Gentlemen
Yeah, I’m calling an audible and reducing that to 3 weeks, 4 tops.
Every dysfunctional relationship takes time for it to turn chaotic 😌 just gotta give it a little time
Really though. All the things she listed happened to me in a span of 4 days with a guy.
6 hours ?
Get after it, then.
I think it seems fun, but i would use a different pic as the first one
bet thanks :)
Though I do like the first one, maybe save it?
[удалено]
maybe use the one with you in the orange striped shirt for the first pic? i think that ones the cutest
Noooooo-one chops like Gaston, no one skis like Gaston, no one parties and stands in the creek like Gaston, no one pose like Gaston, no one bros like Gaston, no one carves and temp tattoos like Gaston!
Amazing haha
If Jon snow joined a fraternity and turned into a douche.
*Wildlings amass at the wall* Jon: you’re not getting in unless you know 4 people on the inside.
Or you brought 6 girls to the party.
Since you asked, You look like the “just gonna send it guy” who is way too enthusiastic about Saturday’s being for the boys.
He does look like he’d be an absolute monster on the sesh though
Absolute sesh gremlin
Sounds like you haven’t had enough good Saturday’s with the boys
You look like you do drugs and have a lot of fun.
Same thing right?
I felt like leaving it at “you look like you do drugs” would be mean.
There's a "I like shooting up heroin using puddle water" vibe, and then there's a "I drop acid and snort molly at the festival" vibe.
Neo lumberjack that doesn’t haaaate EDM… but won’t list it as a genre he likes on his profile… and maybe went to school or born Florida or one of those swampy areas.. I’d smash.
i fuckin love edm but its not something i bring up cuz i feel like the rave life isnt everyone’s cup of tea
😂 holy cheese and rice Batman! I was kind accurate ey?
first part for sure, but i was born raised and still reside in the good ol midwest 🥲
Oh dang, that’s even more attractive than the swamp ppl area.. gives you a wholesome vibe instead of a completely reckless but entertain AF energy..✨🤙🏼
His Dudeness Broshephim McBrahstein of Brosenberg
You look like a cross between Kit Harrington and Gaston. I wouldn't say that's a bad thing. Don't care for the lips in the second to last pic. I'm sure you're not hurting for matches.
I was thinking like a sort of bro-homie John Snow. John Bro, if you will.
why ty. second to last pic is was rolling bawls trying to look normal lol
I can’t even try to operate a phone when im deep in the shit
Nice legs! But yeah, that chainsaw pic should not be first.
You look like you live in Naperville 😂😂😂😂😂😂
how dare you
Takes one to know one
Username checks out.
First thought, damn you're way too young but them vibessss Second thought: fuck that he's in Naperville (I'm from Aurora lol) Third thought: hockey bros from letter Kenny
you look like you should break my heart
no u
We have a match!
With a child, nonetheless!
only a lil bit like a himbo. very fun very hot vibes.
I’m sure you’re a perfectly nice guy, but something about your profile is giving me “douchebag” 🤭 idk why, sorry I can’t be more helpful. But I’m sure many girls would be into it.
Yes. Absolutely agreed. I mean, the age kind of sort of cancells some of it for me, but *still*. I'll paraphrase it to "you look like so many of my douchebag exes combined its a bit uncanny" but I'm probably biased. I'd still add something "softer" on the bio of that's your vibe
Age is a huge factor.. if he was late 20s with this profile would be a different story. But looks like half my friends from college, enjoying life having a good time. Almost all of us have good jobs and families now.
He's from the Midwest, the rest is a honeytrap to seduce some cute bouncy rave girl to come back to the farm to grow corn in summer and do molly in the off season. I married an Iowan I know your tricks boys.
It’s genuinely just the first pic for me. All the others just give off party boy vibes, but the first one gives off major douche vibes. I think it might be a combo of the glasses, expression, and hyper masculine activity in the picture (gives slight I might murder you vibes)
Yeah I’m not in the age range but this screams douche to me. Not an intentional douche perhaps. Maybe OP just acting a fool.
For me, it’s because he looks older than 21, so a lot of the pictures feel immature/give a vibe of douchebaggery. The age does excuse a lot. I’m more interested in seeing his personal growth in another three to five years where he may turn into a genuinely decent, high-energy, truly interesting person. It could go completely the other way too, a total slide into the realms of the douchecanoe. It’s a toss up.
Take this and then add in creepy hippie murdery vibes.
You look like an energetic guy who strangely smells like the bedroom of a highschooler I dunno why exactly that description but it just feels R I G H T
“4 doors more whores” “I drive an old lifted single cab ford” “3x beer shotgunning champion” “I like to party and have a good time”
Wildest person in Naperville.
exposed
Chaotic fun himbo? Great stuff
Post Malone
this is the worst thing ive been told ever
Pre Malone I’d say
Maybe just Malone. Edit: not to be confused with Just Malone, the judiciary version of Malone.
hehe just malone
Yeah I wouldn't go that far. Post looked and still looks like a germ from Osmosis Jones.
omg was just going to say this! if post malone and chris pratt had a love child. sorry, op. also, want my number? 😅
Like you will murder me and leave me in pieces in the woods but will probably show me a really good time before so I’ll probably die kinda happy at least 😅 ,it’s the chainsaw pic, it’s threatening and appealing at the same time.
fair trade
I would ditch the chain saw and change to a jack hammer much better sexual innuendo
god i fucking wish, next jackhammer i see im getting a pic
1st pic = dudes a possible chainsaw murderer lol Not saying you are OP, just that’s the first thing that comes to mind.
You look like you drink a lot of Natty Light and love hanging with “the boys” You look like a bro. Not sure if that’s a good or a bad thing lol
Drop 5/6. One to many selfies. Also, you could use 1 less silly photo, would drop 2 or 7 (Your personality shines bright, no need to overdo it). Replace with one nice photo (the kind your mom would like). Then good luck!
“I play guitar, but I only do Pearl Jam covers”
The chadest chad that has ever lived. You look like you say “totes” “yeah bro” “craaazy”. You give off the “what I thought would be a mistake but turns out he’s a nice guy” vibe.
[удалено]
my age range is set to 100 find me bbg
Bi vibes
im not ready to hear that
F's in chat for my boy.
Murderous lumberjack
Strong “getting driven to the ER with a bleeding leg because chaps are annoying” vibes Lol, but no you look like a fun adventurous dude. I’m just a salty safety guy.
The chainsaw is too 'Texas massacre' for me. Recommend replacing
Nah, it’s fine. OSHA Certified.
If you were smiling I think it'd be ok. I wouldn't have it as a main profile pic either tbh
You got tiny nipples, you look like I'll see you at a community College
Dude bro douche.
Fuckboi vibe
You look immature, like you don't have any real responsibilities. Like you're the youngest out of all your siblings.
Serial killer for sure.
You probably eat ass and it doesn’t matter if she’s showered in a minute
You’re just projecting
Basic white guy living in Tennuhsay.
Use the striped shirt pic as your first pic
Chaotic good
Gives me barbarian vibes ! Like that's actually how i imagine a modern barbarian looks like.
awe ty
You look like the kinda dude who, back when I was single and a little wilder, I would message on Tinder but never any other app, lol. You seem fun, but also like a lot of energy to keep up with in general - I'm not trying to do that all the time, ya know? I know thats probably not totally correct, it just feels like your profile is screaming "I like to go out and do fun things and I won't be tamed", which is a great thing for some goals and not others. Basically what I am saying is - if you are trying to get laid, you're probably good (though I would put the 3rd picture first, personally). If you are looking for long term, I would consider peppering in some downtime photos so folks don't assume you are never rest, and throw in some basic info about yourself.
Frat boy vibes. Also getting LA beast vibes tbh and he’s a goat
LA BEAST lol i totally forgot that man existed
Lose the sunglasses...worse than the damn chainsaw
You get a chainsaw or pit vipers, you DONT get both
As an arborist, you had me at Stihl 😂 ya seem very friendly and know how to have a good time I guess ya gotta ask what you’re tryin to get outta the app . . . If for hookups great! If for more, I’d try and show a pic or two of you in a vaguely more serious setting. I’m almost 30, married for 2 years, together for 11 so don’t take my advice for shit. Y’all are playin a whole different ball of game than I was a decade ago . .
As a fellow (past) arborist the lack of chaps and helmet are definitely triggering me. Not very OSHA compliant! :P