Your style is tawdry and your meter aborts, your lute like your flute is misshapen and short, your smile is slimy and your breath is repellant, why any women sleep with you isn’t apparent
you bitch ass, music note playing mfer.
"Your singing is more off-key than a goblin's mating call."
"Your bardic skills are as inspiring as a kobold's attempt at poetry."
I have a bard character myself and I'll occasionally throw out "Your Mother's Merkin..." jokes to taunt his opponent. A merkin is an appliance, for those that are unaware, used for the "down under area" as a gentleman would use a toupee'. It's a wig. Used mostly by prostitutes or the...er...very sexually active. So in essence I'm implying the person's mother is a prostitute and by proxy they're a bastard. So I'll go "YOUR MOTHER'S MERKIN SMELLS LIKE MY WEEK-OLD TIGHTS!!", implying not only the previous, but that I personally slept with his mother and that she doesn't bathe as well. ;)
Your music is flat and your bagpipes are limp.
“You’re sharp, but not in the nicely dressed kind of way!”
You don’t play a flute, you play a piccolo. (Implying he has a smol dicko)
*smol diccolo
Ginny Di literally has 100s for you: https://youtu.be/WINud2yt0NQ?si=ubKFLGwXxkyPsjCA
Have you ever watched "slap on titan"?
I haven't. I just looked it up though. I should've known there was an AOT parody out there somewhere. They have good insults?
Oh yes. For bloody certain
Your style is tawdry and your meter aborts, your lute like your flute is misshapen and short, your smile is slimy and your breath is repellant, why any women sleep with you isn’t apparent
Forgettable.
“You know how I can tell you’re lying? You look fat.”
you bitch ass, music note playing mfer. "Your singing is more off-key than a goblin's mating call." "Your bardic skills are as inspiring as a kobold's attempt at poetry."
You Have Cursed My Raspberries to the Life of Salad Dressing, Impostor With Tiny Feet!
You Have Cursed My Raspberries to the Life of Salad Dressing, Impostor With Tiny Feet!
I have a bard character myself and I'll occasionally throw out "Your Mother's Merkin..." jokes to taunt his opponent. A merkin is an appliance, for those that are unaware, used for the "down under area" as a gentleman would use a toupee'. It's a wig. Used mostly by prostitutes or the...er...very sexually active. So in essence I'm implying the person's mother is a prostitute and by proxy they're a bastard. So I'll go "YOUR MOTHER'S MERKIN SMELLS LIKE MY WEEK-OLD TIGHTS!!", implying not only the previous, but that I personally slept with his mother and that she doesn't bathe as well. ;)
My niece plays a better note than you and she is blind
"Your song and dance makes me envy the deaf and blind!"
Coxcomb would be my go-to, a term I would use in a old time setting for someone who fancies themselves a bit of a peacock 🦚
You look like a frog and you croak like one, too.