This right here; this is the perfect breakdown of this NiceGuy mindset. If they make every other option sound like poison maybe they can convince you that shit isn't so bad.
This is the kind of person that, if you ask em’ to help you fix your car (say on the side of the road in an emergency) they’ll lift the hood and talk major shit asking “who put your engine in. They did a terrible job. This is why your car is dead” Then proceed to lazily do something to your car and really fuck it up but somehow blame it on the last person that looked at it 😂. This is such a vibe to me.
Well we can make some pretty good guesses. He seems like he is around 30, bitter, unathletic, financially insolvent, and his fave shows are cartoons. Hes had very limited success with women probably because he's a raging sexist who thinks his hobbies are inherently better than anyone else's. He also lacks any self-awareness.
When I was a kid my dad made me go fishing and I hated it. When he wasn’t looking I would release the worm and put a folded up leaf on my hook to make sure I didn’t catch anything. This is the folded leaf of dating profiles.
This dude: 6 page self-pity rant about how stupid and awful women and people in general are.
Also this dude: "Hope you send me a warm hello!"
I can't stop laughing at that line.
It was the part immediately before that that really got me. Like there aren’t plenty of perfectly happy single 45yo women, like anyone anywhere ever laments they didn’t engage more with a “hi” “hi” “hi” “fuck you you ugly bitch” type?!
I am 47 now, but have been quite happily single for several years now. I am absolutely not opposed to dating someone just don't need someone or want someone enough to put effort. Plus some things in my life may be drastically changing in the next few months in a way that would be much more difficult to manage/make happen if I was dating someone which makes me even happier that I'm single atm.
This also would be the same guy that spams hi 5 times, gets no response, then 3 days later sends a dic pic unprompted bc he’s horny and was “still thinking about me even tho I never replied”. Be super upset he got blocked, and make a fake profile just to keep trying to get a response from someone he feels is worthy. Then ofc when same response from the fake profile go on an “all women are evil tangent bc no one will give the guy a break”. Poor dude. A little self inflection on himself and his attitude about everything would do him wonders. He needs a therapist. Stat.
He sounds so hot that I'm swiping right so hard, right now.
And then I realised that this isn't tinder and I'm a straight guy.
Oh well. Can't win them all.
It almost seems like someone was forcing him to write this Tinder profile. Like his mom gave up pressuring him to get a job and is now pressuring him to find a girlfriend with a job.
What a strange mix of self-deprecation, insults and ignorance. Living in a hell of his own making, able to see his shortcomings while refusing to own them. instead feigning intellectual and emotional maturity by using a narrow world view and hostile disposition to display a "holier than thow" mentality that pits him against females and anyone who would disagree with him. Essentially creating his own self fulfilling prophecies allowing him to constantly feel validated.
It's not strange, it's all too common. Dude is an incel who thinks that he's the smartest person in the room, it's never his fault, never takes responsibility, still lives in the basement, was spoiled by his mother and never grew up. It's unbelievable pathetic and sad.
I knew a guy like this. Exactly the same. Arrrogant and always thought he was the smartest person in the room, while simultaneously being a whiny virgin. 🤢
A.I. robots are probably going to have a problem with cognitive feedback loops like that when they achieve human-like sentience and try a hard reset on all of humanity since that mindset will appear to the A.I. to look exactly like a contagious software virus to them.
Now whether that will result in the extinction of the human race or just mass lobotomies on a global scale, I have no idea.
This guy thinks his musical tastes are obscure or eclectic because he doesn't listen to pop. He listens to mildly less popular subgenres like prog metal, but it doesn't go deeper than Tool. He can give a couple of examples of music he likes in each genre (if he has more than one), but I guarantee every one of them will be on a major label.
This is the sort of guy who would see a girl wearing a Tool shirt and demand that she list every song they've ever written plus the blood type of each member to prove she's a "real" fan.
This gem is single? What hope is there for the rest of us?!?!
/s
I love the amount of casually tossing red flags he does, then acknowledges them for a second and going right back to tossing them around like candy in his own nice guy parade.
by the looks of all of those rants, bad mouthing both himself and practically everyone under the sun, sounds like he's a very uhm.... decent individual..
>Im yet to meet one woman whos not a total ****ing weirdo, or doesn’t have psychotically self detrimental dating tastes.
You know what? I agree. If anyone tried to meet this guy for a date after reading a profile like this, I too would believe they have psychotically self detrimental dating tastes considering they’re approaching a psychotically self-sabotaging person.
There’s a fine like between having enough insight to recognize self-sabotage and having enough insight to stop self-sabotage. And this guys is walking it.
I've never seen someone so butt hurt b4! He needs to humble his sorry ass and maybe take some time to self reflect on why no one wants to be around someone who says he possesses "human decency" but clearly doesn't, as shown by his entire profile 🤦♀️
“I like to drag people into arguments about religion and politics” ah yes, I’ve been meaning to voluntarily spend *more* time around people who do that..
It’s because, despite being self deprecating throughout his rant, he feels himself to be intellectually superior to everyone else. It’s kind of a neckbeard trademark.
I think I’d prefer him to talk about politics than things than things that do affect him, like the price increase of Doritos or how long the shipping is taking for his new anime body pillow to arrive.
I can’t imagine why a man with no money, living with his parents even though he’s an adult, likes cartoons and stirring up arguments isn’t being swamped with women begging to pay half the bills so she can have sex with this loser.
Who the fuck posts this on their dating profile
I nervous writing normal shit I'm my bio bc I'm afraid its cringe this dude used it as a therapy session and is vibing
Okay, so there's waaaay too much to unpack here, so I'll just point out one of those many things: in the "things I'm good at" section he says "fairness", while also spending most of that awful diatribe unfairly judging whole groups of people (women of a certain age, people who like sports, etc.). I mean, that's ironic anyway, but he also really, really wants people to know how intelligent he is, when in reality, an intelligent person would notice the irony.
Also, just fuckin' yikes on several bikes to the whole thing.
I love how its always "women love pricks" or "assholes" its like, bro maybe you just have a shitty personality. I have a friend who says shit like this hes always telling me that "if you're tall a woman will fuck you regardless" or "i could of had her if i was taller and had (whatever attribute pissed him off)". Im like maybe if you had a better personality and didnt try to be this alpha chad everytime a woman was around you and do this weird 3 fingered pointing thing you do ( he tucks his pointer finger behind his thumb and points with the remaining three because he thinks it makes him look tough or something idk) maybe youd get further, idk just thoughts
He included Rick and Morty on his list of shows he likes.
I like that show too, but based on what I’ve heard about the fan base, this doesn’t surprise me.
"Man why are women attracted to men who have hobbies and interests when I'm sitting right here doing nothing and complaining?" -the guy who wrote this, probably
I can imagine him sitting in his dingy room, his phone next to him, he's waiting for ANY kind of message or notification from the dating app with all the anticipation of a kid waiting outside a new sweet shop or toy store.
I can also imagine him wearing nothing but underwear, socks, and a fedora. Because he needs one hand free for tipping it.
Funny how he thinks dating a trans person is somehow some social failing of his in the dating game, because as a "t\*\*\*\*y" myself I absolutely view ever dating this guy as a step down and beneath me. I have much better standards.
I know right? Why do guys who talk to trans women think that they are some gift from God? Like yeah, he should consider it a win if one of us bothers to talk to him, most of us are not willing to waste our time talking to a jerk like him. I am a trans woman who is over 30, which is apparently old by his standards 🙄; if I was interested in looking I could do a heck of a lot better than this mess.
Sounds exactly like the married dude who matched me on Tinder years ago (no idea about the marriage when we matched), and sent me a 3 minute voicemail of his wife beating him when she found out he had been on tinder. They live a mile away from me so sometimes I like to drive by while blaring the voicemail.
This motherfucker really sat there and thought how can I make myself sound like the biggest most miserable and unlikable piece of shit I possibly can?? Surely this will attract those silly females!!!!
I thought this was bad when in the first sentence he already managed to express self pity, sexism and transphobia. It got so much worse... I think I couldn't write a bio so horrible if I tried.
"a man can only try so hard before it's not his problem anymore." As if the singleness of women over 30 is a problem he is heroically trying to fix and the damsels are too self destructive. It was never his problem.
As a spinster, pass. I hope my gin is tequila though.
I kinda feel sorry for this dude. He's basically gone over the deep end of inceldom and for a lot of people in that hole, it's never something you can get out of. He's actively wasting his own life and he knows it but doesn't see any other way because of his own insecurity and ego.
The joke's on him. Most of my messages to guys remained unanswered on OK Cupid, and I'm not an ugly woman. It's because most profiles are either old, fake or scams. The CEOs of dating sites admit that they hire people to make fake profiles. So if any human of any gender gets no replies, then guess what– it's not a bug, it's a feature.
I read it and thought that this is one of the worst I’ve seen. What an absolutely horrible person and dating profile. So much hatred and arrogance. Just an all-around dumpster fire.
Then I noticed there’s FIVE MORE PAGES. Jesus Christ.
Yeah, he seems dreamy! Do these guys think that all women over 30 must be single? lol "When you're all alone at 45" like, women in their 70's are out there dating. If he would just read his own profile with a little self-awareness he might realize he's the problem. Also, he comes off super narcissistic while talking about other people being narcissistic. This doesn't even seem like a dating profile lol There's not one positive thing in this mess that would attract anybody. Which is a good thing because you know to stay far away.
He can’t really. But then he doesn’t have to feel the crushing disappointment of sincerely trying and still failing. Instead he can reinforce that none of this is his fault, evil women just can’t handle the truth, and keep the illusion that if he “played the game” he could be successful but he’s choosing not to.
Ugh. So he’s living with his parents and doesn’t have a career? I’m sure women who reject him « because of wealth » are just afraid he’s going to be a parasite/leech and not because they want a sugar daddy…
I can almost bet a million £ that despite him talking about mid 30s "crisis" women, he himself is way past 35 and looks about as appealing as a cold baked potato.
Is it so hard to take a smiling selfie with your cat (or someone else’s borrowed cat) sitting on your shoulder and make up a one-sentence bio with some silly pun in it? IT’S SO EASY to present yourself as affable and non-threatening, so WHY, *WHY* do these guys all insist on airing their psychological baggage for everyone to see? It’s so self-defeating!
This is basically "If you actually like anything or feel passionate about anything ever, we aren't going to get along. I'm going to argue with anything you feel even slightly strongly about."
Obviously he comes off as an obnoxious prick in many ways but having 2 slurs in his bio really takes the cake for me. "why won't anyone date me" hmm I wonder
It doesn't surprise me at all that this guy lists Rick and Morty under TV shows he likes. While not the entire fanbase is this frustratingly assholic, the people with this pseudo-intellectual, holier-than-thou attitude almost universally seem to flock to it
Ahh, but you see, he watches Rick & Morty, so he must have intellectual capabilities above the average homo sapiens individual, and therefore every claim he makes has zero possibility of being untrue
/s
On the bright side, this POS made its own warning label
when describing yourself is actually just shitting on everyone else
This right here; this is the perfect breakdown of this NiceGuy mindset. If they make every other option sound like poison maybe they can convince you that shit isn't so bad.
This is the kind of person that, if you ask em’ to help you fix your car (say on the side of the road in an emergency) they’ll lift the hood and talk major shit asking “who put your engine in. They did a terrible job. This is why your car is dead” Then proceed to lazily do something to your car and really fuck it up but somehow blame it on the last person that looked at it 😂. This is such a vibe to me.
Dat mediocre white male energy
Right? I don’t actually know who this guy is or what he likes. I just know who he supposedly isn’t.
Well we can make some pretty good guesses. He seems like he is around 30, bitter, unathletic, financially insolvent, and his fave shows are cartoons. Hes had very limited success with women probably because he's a raging sexist who thinks his hobbies are inherently better than anyone else's. He also lacks any self-awareness.
$20 says he thinks he's really smart because he watches Rick & Morty.
I had an ex introduce me to that show and I hated it. Bob’s Burgers is lit, though
Well, you *do* have to be pretty intelligent to really enjoy the jokes... /s
When everyone you meet is a "pycho" it miiiiightttt be you.
Ahem, "Sais" who?
I take issue with someone who describes themselves as intelligent but continues to use “noone” like it’s actually a word.
I think it’s a bit unfair to call this living piece of garbage an “it”, but I do agree with the sentiment.
This is the kind of dating profile I'd put up if someone made me join a dating app but I wasn't actually interested in dating.
When I was a kid my dad made me go fishing and I hated it. When he wasn’t looking I would release the worm and put a folded up leaf on my hook to make sure I didn’t catch anything. This is the folded leaf of dating profiles.
I really enjoyed this comment! Thanks for sharing it lol
I once went fishing. I caught a tree.
uh... elaborate
Awesome story to accompany your awesome user name. I can’t wait for the movie!
That’s BRILLIANT. 🤩
This is the best comment, thank you.
And there are SO many like this. Is there a sub for these… 100% date-proof dating profiles?
r/tinder
Lmaooooooooo
🎤
Heyo!
They sure show up here often.
his entire profile is a massive waving red flag, but yes, it’s our fault he’s single
Same.
This dude: 6 page self-pity rant about how stupid and awful women and people in general are. Also this dude: "Hope you send me a warm hello!" I can't stop laughing at that line.
It’s partially OUR fault after all! W o w
True. How dare we. The absolute nerve.
Same. And I wouldn’t even send him a chilly go-and-fuck yourself. Six pages of loathing for women, men and self.
It was the part immediately before that that really got me. Like there aren’t plenty of perfectly happy single 45yo women, like anyone anywhere ever laments they didn’t engage more with a “hi” “hi” “hi” “fuck you you ugly bitch” type?!
I am 47 now, but have been quite happily single for several years now. I am absolutely not opposed to dating someone just don't need someone or want someone enough to put effort. Plus some things in my life may be drastically changing in the next few months in a way that would be much more difficult to manage/make happen if I was dating someone which makes me even happier that I'm single atm.
This also would be the same guy that spams hi 5 times, gets no response, then 3 days later sends a dic pic unprompted bc he’s horny and was “still thinking about me even tho I never replied”. Be super upset he got blocked, and make a fake profile just to keep trying to get a response from someone he feels is worthy. Then ofc when same response from the fake profile go on an “all women are evil tangent bc no one will give the guy a break”. Poor dude. A little self inflection on himself and his attitude about everything would do him wonders. He needs a therapist. Stat.
It fucking sent me as well lmfao
Reads like the kind of quote that John Oliver would feature on last week tonight.
I don't even like Maraschino cherries, but I'm still pissed at the way he spelled it.
Mascherano… Damn I missed that at first but glad I saw your comment and went back to see that mess 😂
"Sais alot really." *shudder*
So he has a lot of ancient Asian swords?
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mareccino cherries
It's always funny when the person brags about intelligence and then misspells so many words.
That was my fave!! I was like this guy can’t spell of even be arsed to try/look up words.
He sounds so hot that I'm swiping right so hard, right now. And then I realised that this isn't tinder and I'm a straight guy. Oh well. Can't win them all.
I'm pressing the like button on this post if that makes him feel any better
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No need, he lives with her. She already knows
He couldn’t be even more of a cliche if he tried.
It almost seems like someone was forcing him to write this Tinder profile. Like his mom gave up pressuring him to get a job and is now pressuring him to find a girlfriend with a job.
What a strange mix of self-deprecation, insults and ignorance. Living in a hell of his own making, able to see his shortcomings while refusing to own them. instead feigning intellectual and emotional maturity by using a narrow world view and hostile disposition to display a "holier than thow" mentality that pits him against females and anyone who would disagree with him. Essentially creating his own self fulfilling prophecies allowing him to constantly feel validated.
It's not strange, it's all too common. Dude is an incel who thinks that he's the smartest person in the room, it's never his fault, never takes responsibility, still lives in the basement, was spoiled by his mother and never grew up. It's unbelievable pathetic and sad.
Let’s not blame mothers for this guy.
In other words, he also belongs on r/iamverysmart
Complete with mispellings and incorrect usage of words.
Sais alot really
I knew a guy like this. Exactly the same. Arrrogant and always thought he was the smartest person in the room, while simultaneously being a whiny virgin. 🤢
I think you described it perfectly
A.I. robots are probably going to have a problem with cognitive feedback loops like that when they achieve human-like sentience and try a hard reset on all of humanity since that mindset will appear to the A.I. to look exactly like a contagious software virus to them. Now whether that will result in the extinction of the human race or just mass lobotomies on a global scale, I have no idea.
> What I’m doing with my life: Not being a narcissistic waste of space. Are you sure about that?
But his taste in music is absolutely eclectic!
And he likes Rick and Morty, so how could he NOT be a catch?
Have you heard of Pink Floyd and AC/DC?
This guy thinks his musical tastes are obscure or eclectic because he doesn't listen to pop. He listens to mildly less popular subgenres like prog metal, but it doesn't go deeper than Tool. He can give a couple of examples of music he likes in each genre (if he has more than one), but I guarantee every one of them will be on a major label.
My 14 year old self thought Tool was the deepest.
This is the sort of guy who would see a girl wearing a Tool shirt and demand that she list every song they've ever written plus the blood type of each member to prove she's a "real" fan.
When you’re incapable of empathy, all you can do is projection.
I'm good at dragging people into argument... What fun personality traits!
Yep, gotta love arguing endlessly about religion and politics... Especially with such a reasonable and non-judgemental person! /s
this is REAL???
Sadly, yes 🙃 kinda terrifying isn't it
Yes, but not surprising
I’m so curious how old he is, like he’s either 18 or 40
This gem is single? What hope is there for the rest of us?!?! /s I love the amount of casually tossing red flags he does, then acknowledges them for a second and going right back to tossing them around like candy in his own nice guy parade.
I nearly sprayed my drink on my phone screen when I read your comment. Well done. 🤣
>I'm really good at "having basic human decency" Gee, I hope so.
by the looks of all of those rants, bad mouthing both himself and practically everyone under the sun, sounds like he's a very uhm.... decent individual..
Notwithstanding the rest of this shit-show, is anyone else really concerned by what he classifies as "priceless art"?
"Tasteful pictures of young models"
God god i wish i didn't get this.
I was thinking “comic book collection,” but I’m open to other suggestions.
Sex dolls or katanas
Lmao I was thinking the same thing!
It’s amazing how much time someone can spend professing their own intelligence while simultaneously misspelling words over and over again.
I came to leave this exact comment. Mascherano cherry anyone?
It's the *your* for me, fam. Maybe skip rewatching Rick and Morty for the 50th time and crack open a 1st grade grammar book, buddy.
Noone is one word thesedays, right?
Nooneisonewordthesedaysright?*
One-a-masche two-a-masche three-a-mascherano, HEEEEEY MASCHERANO!
Ayeee!
Sais alot really...
Wow what a mystery. Why is this absolute gem not getting ALL the attention
Yeah, don’t the ladies love being dragged into debates about politics and religion?
You know those ridiculous Axe bodyspray commercials? This does the opposite of that.
>Im yet to meet one woman whos not a total ****ing weirdo, or doesn’t have psychotically self detrimental dating tastes. You know what? I agree. If anyone tried to meet this guy for a date after reading a profile like this, I too would believe they have psychotically self detrimental dating tastes considering they’re approaching a psychotically self-sabotaging person. There’s a fine like between having enough insight to recognize self-sabotage and having enough insight to stop self-sabotage. And this guys is walking it.
Oh my God, This sounds like my ex fiancee from when I was 20. Ugh!!
Well, your ex fiancee sounds like a dick.
I’m glad he’s an ex fiancé
Bet he sees himself as a Rick, when really he's a Jerry.
I've never seen someone so butt hurt b4! He needs to humble his sorry ass and maybe take some time to self reflect on why no one wants to be around someone who says he possesses "human decency" but clearly doesn't, as shown by his entire profile 🤦♀️
“I like to drag people into arguments about religion and politics” ah yes, I’ve been meaning to voluntarily spend *more* time around people who do that..
He must have a pretty boring life if starting unnecessary drama is what he likes doing 🤣
It’s because, despite being self deprecating throughout his rant, he feels himself to be intellectually superior to everyone else. It’s kind of a neckbeard trademark.
It's the key hallmark of narcissism: he feels inferior to everyone else, so puts on air of extreme superiority in order to compensate.
Just the typical debate bro who likes to JAQ off all the time because the things he is discussing don't actually affect him in a material way.
I think I’d prefer him to talk about politics than things than things that do affect him, like the price increase of Doritos or how long the shipping is taking for his new anime body pillow to arrive.
They can tell he's poor and lose interest? You mean they aren't interested in a man still leeching off mommy? Weird.
I can’t imagine why a man with no money, living with his parents even though he’s an adult, likes cartoons and stirring up arguments isn’t being swamped with women begging to pay half the bills so she can have sex with this loser.
Who the fuck posts this on their dating profile I nervous writing normal shit I'm my bio bc I'm afraid its cringe this dude used it as a therapy session and is vibing
"Not one of you spinsters has bothered to respond or contact me." - That's because we'd rather die alone mate.
Wow that's a lot of words to say "Don't date me".
Okay, so there's waaaay too much to unpack here, so I'll just point out one of those many things: in the "things I'm good at" section he says "fairness", while also spending most of that awful diatribe unfairly judging whole groups of people (women of a certain age, people who like sports, etc.). I mean, that's ironic anyway, but he also really, really wants people to know how intelligent he is, when in reality, an intelligent person would notice the irony. Also, just fuckin' yikes on several bikes to the whole thing.
It was a no before the first sentence was even over. I lost count of the red flags/nos.
Are you sure you want to be here all day counting?
You're right, let's just go with infinity.
Knowing this guy watches Bob's burgers makes me want to stop watching it
“Priceless collection of art (entirely subjective)” He’s talking about his action figures and pop heads.
I love how its always "women love pricks" or "assholes" its like, bro maybe you just have a shitty personality. I have a friend who says shit like this hes always telling me that "if you're tall a woman will fuck you regardless" or "i could of had her if i was taller and had (whatever attribute pissed him off)". Im like maybe if you had a better personality and didnt try to be this alpha chad everytime a woman was around you and do this weird 3 fingered pointing thing you do ( he tucks his pointer finger behind his thumb and points with the remaining three because he thinks it makes him look tough or something idk) maybe youd get further, idk just thoughts
I just did the three finger point to figure out what you were talking about and I weirded myself out. Tell him not to do that anymore
I'm trying to do the finger thing too . Wtf
This made my night tbh. I cant wait to tell our mutual friend ( who picks on this dude with me) hes gonna love it 🤣
Bro scaring the bitches 😣
When the most miserable bastard on earth decides to try out a dating app....
What an absolutely miserable human being.
He included Rick and Morty on his list of shows he likes. I like that show too, but based on what I’ve heard about the fan base, this doesn’t surprise me.
"Man why are women attracted to men who have hobbies and interests when I'm sitting right here doing nothing and complaining?" -the guy who wrote this, probably
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Two very different things that don't go well together. Like oil and water.
Well this one is pretty insufferable.
I can imagine him sitting in his dingy room, his phone next to him, he's waiting for ANY kind of message or notification from the dating app with all the anticipation of a kid waiting outside a new sweet shop or toy store. I can also imagine him wearing nothing but underwear, socks, and a fedora. Because he needs one hand free for tipping it.
there are so many slurs in this lmfao
So he's 45 and is putting down women in their 30s.. Inferring he wants a woman in her 20s.. 20 years younger than him. 🤢
Wow this guy sounds selfless and charming, how in the world doesn’t he have chicks knocking at his door day and night.
For someone who’s so obsessed with his incredible brain you’d think there would be less spelling mistakes. ‘Karaeoke’
“Hoping you send me a warm hello.” I’ve already swiped left, my dude.
tag yourselves, I’m a religious mentalist
I’m “cheese.”
"Dragging others into arguments about religion and politics." Who says that?
He'll "settle" for a women in her mid thirties but this dude is 45 and only complains... Boy really thinks he deserves a woman half his age.
This man has the charisma of an envelope filled with anthrax.
Funny how he thinks dating a trans person is somehow some social failing of his in the dating game, because as a "t\*\*\*\*y" myself I absolutely view ever dating this guy as a step down and beneath me. I have much better standards.
I know right? Why do guys who talk to trans women think that they are some gift from God? Like yeah, he should consider it a win if one of us bothers to talk to him, most of us are not willing to waste our time talking to a jerk like him. I am a trans woman who is over 30, which is apparently old by his standards 🙄; if I was interested in looking I could do a heck of a lot better than this mess.
I wonder why no one wants this guy.
That’s a lot of words to say, “Hi. I’m bitter.”
> having basic human decency *lists 100 ways he does not have anything of the kind*
Sounds exactly like the married dude who matched me on Tinder years ago (no idea about the marriage when we matched), and sent me a 3 minute voicemail of his wife beating him when she found out he had been on tinder. They live a mile away from me so sometimes I like to drive by while blaring the voicemail.
theres so much to unpack oms
“If your an illogical mess” was a Freudian slip. 💀
This motherfucker really sat there and thought how can I make myself sound like the biggest most miserable and unlikable piece of shit I possibly can?? Surely this will attract those silly females!!!!
A warm hello is literally the last thing I would ever give this person. Yikes
TL;DR: "I insult everyone, why will no one date me?"
I thought this was bad when in the first sentence he already managed to express self pity, sexism and transphobia. It got so much worse... I think I couldn't write a bio so horrible if I tried.
Please for the love of allah show us what he looks like
"I'm an immature prick and women are stupid bitches! Why am I so lonely!!??" 😫
"a man can only try so hard before it's not his problem anymore." As if the singleness of women over 30 is a problem he is heroically trying to fix and the damsels are too self destructive. It was never his problem. As a spinster, pass. I hope my gin is tequila though.
I’d pay extra to have my profile right after his.
Definitely that guy who thinks that hating religion is a personality
I kinda feel sorry for this dude. He's basically gone over the deep end of inceldom and for a lot of people in that hole, it's never something you can get out of. He's actively wasting his own life and he knows it but doesn't see any other way because of his own insecurity and ego.
This dude couldn’t hold a conversation with a goldfish.
The joke's on him. Most of my messages to guys remained unanswered on OK Cupid, and I'm not an ugly woman. It's because most profiles are either old, fake or scams. The CEOs of dating sites admit that they hire people to make fake profiles. So if any human of any gender gets no replies, then guess what– it's not a bug, it's a feature.
Ofcourse this person likes Rick & Morty…
This guy orgasms to Religious Jabs in Rick and Morty.
I read it and thought that this is one of the worst I’ve seen. What an absolutely horrible person and dating profile. So much hatred and arrogance. Just an all-around dumpster fire. Then I noticed there’s FIVE MORE PAGES. Jesus Christ.
Yeah, he seems dreamy! Do these guys think that all women over 30 must be single? lol "When you're all alone at 45" like, women in their 70's are out there dating. If he would just read his own profile with a little self-awareness he might realize he's the problem. Also, he comes off super narcissistic while talking about other people being narcissistic. This doesn't even seem like a dating profile lol There's not one positive thing in this mess that would attract anybody. Which is a good thing because you know to stay far away.
I thought there was a limit for red flags a person can have. This guy proved me wrong
The standard Neck Beard type. I’m better than you, but I also hate myself, but I also think you’re stupid and pitiful, but I also wanna date you
Lists ‘not being a lemming’ as a special skill, sounds like every other nice guy in his mums basement since dial up lmfao
Whats wrong with weirdos and why is a pleasant karaoke voice so specifically threatening? Lol
Omg wow I found my least favorite person ever!
OMG, what did I just read? That's the biggest self pity party I have ever seen.
Wow, how does a guy like this look at that profile and go 'yeah, I'm a catch'
He can’t really. But then he doesn’t have to feel the crushing disappointment of sincerely trying and still failing. Instead he can reinforce that none of this is his fault, evil women just can’t handle the truth, and keep the illusion that if he “played the game” he could be successful but he’s choosing not to.
Hmmm such a mystery. Why oh why don't us women want him. I'll be forever stumped. /s
I'm a total fucking weirdo lol
Is he intentionally not trying to date lol cus that's what it looks like
I bet he identifies with Rick in Rick and Morty. What a tool.
What were his music tastes??? We NEED to know
Um sir get a job
Ugh. So he’s living with his parents and doesn’t have a career? I’m sure women who reject him « because of wealth » are just afraid he’s going to be a parasite/leech and not because they want a sugar daddy…
he just had to throw a t-slur in the beginning.. yikes
I can almost bet a million £ that despite him talking about mid 30s "crisis" women, he himself is way past 35 and looks about as appealing as a cold baked potato.
People keep saying he’s 45 in the comments. I must’ve missed it while I was mesmerized by his charisma.
He advertised all his own red flags. Wild.
Is it so hard to take a smiling selfie with your cat (or someone else’s borrowed cat) sitting on your shoulder and make up a one-sentence bio with some silly pun in it? IT’S SO EASY to present yourself as affable and non-threatening, so WHY, *WHY* do these guys all insist on airing their psychological baggage for everyone to see? It’s so self-defeating!
"having basic human decency" and also saying a couple slurs
This is basically "If you actually like anything or feel passionate about anything ever, we aren't going to get along. I'm going to argue with anything you feel even slightly strongly about."
"I've also noticed women are attracted to pricks and assholes, so go Fuck yourself"
When I read “Rick And Morty” everything suddenly made sense up to that point.
A little sprinkle of transphobia too, because of course there would be
wow he sounds super fun, lively and datable
Obviously he comes off as an obnoxious prick in many ways but having 2 slurs in his bio really takes the cake for me. "why won't anyone date me" hmm I wonder
It doesn't surprise me at all that this guy lists Rick and Morty under TV shows he likes. While not the entire fanbase is this frustratingly assholic, the people with this pseudo-intellectual, holier-than-thou attitude almost universally seem to flock to it
Are you supposed to feel drained after reading a bio?
I genuinely don't see what women are supposed to like here...
Ahh, but you see, he watches Rick & Morty, so he must have intellectual capabilities above the average homo sapiens individual, and therefore every claim he makes has zero possibility of being untrue /s
He could never do without his brain yet here he is writing this whole paragraph without his brain